Dear people in a game that shall remain nameless...

If you don't know what you're doing, follow those of us who do. I understand it's slightly complicated, as I had issues fully grasping the concept at first too. The last thing you should do though, especially after admitting to everyone that you're brand new to this section of the game, is run off by yourself or try to lead.

The reason our side is the most successful currently is because we have a nice sized group of us that is organized over voice chat. We make plans that make sense and execute them in a highly coordinated fashion. It is not because of the following (but you seem to think it is?):

1. Feeding because you think you're badass and that you can take down people at max level, when you're not even half-way there, solo
2. Not using the proper equipment to complete a task and instead running in head first because you saw a zerg do it successfully on one occasion and don't understand the concept of numbers. Basically, dying needlessly without feeding actual players.
3. Letting that thing hit you that we warned you not to let hit you or standing in or on things we asked you not to. It really is for your own good, but apparently you like the needless dying thing.
4. Using up our resources with your constant and needless deaths, so that when one of us dies we have to take the long way back to the fight.
5. Refusing to help with expenses of battle, causing us to be short on stuff we need.
6. Buying the incorrect items for the task at hand and going with it anyways, taking up our spots for the proper items and wasting your currency.
7. Going completely opposite of where we're going or lagging far behind. I get that not everyone is as fast as everyone else, but you can't get mad at us for leaving you behind if you /afk in the field, not even bothering to hide. That's a good way to get picked off. Going in the opposite direction as literally everyone else... No sympathy for you. Sometimes there's multiple smaller groups spreading out to cover more land, but you don't go with any for whatever reason and think you are your own group. You can't solo defeat a bunch of enemies and you certainly cannot cap stuff solo, so I don't understand why you insist on trying.
8. I just like the number 8 and don't like you.

Some key things you, as a new player to said nameless game, should do include: follow the group you end up with wherever they are going, follow the leader of said group's instructions to the letter, absorb all the wisdom around you by spending as much time learning as possible, help provide the proper items (plz ask, most people are nice enough to tell you what stuff is for what), and avoid giving commands or advice until you've spent a lot of time in said nameless game and nearly perfected the art that is conquering all the things.

I'm sure these rules and baddies apply to a lot of games, so if it sounds like it makes sense and you're thinking to yourself it might not be a bad idea to obey the above commands... do your fellow gamers a favor and obey. Someday when you have more experience you may come across someone who was like you used to be and you'll understand the frustration those before you have felt.

tl;dr? Game baddies are bad and should read the above stuff.

Dear Drivers...

Naturally, I must target you for my first real blog entry. You are the inspiration for this blog's existence, so it's only fair.

This is mostly directed to the early morning and late night drivers that I often encounter because of my work schedule. The mid-day drivers aren't all that bad (except during the lunch and dinner rushes), though today a couple morons came out late (or early). I have a few requests for all of you morons out there. Honestly, they're for your own safety. Die on your own time, not mine.

Request one: Take your fucking time, but do it behind me.
Pulling out in front of someone just to go slower than them is very uncool. You could have waited 5 more seconds and gotten behind me, as there were no other cars but me on our side of the fucking road. But no, you had to be sure to be first so that you could go 15 MPH below the speed limit in relatively good weather, but while there's incoming traffic on the other side of the road, so I'm stuck behind you for 30 minutes.

Request two: If you absolutely must go 15 MPH over the speed limit, get the fuck off my ass and do it already.
Sometimes I like to go 45 in a 55, not gonna lie here. Sometimes it is necessary to go 40-45 in a 55 because ice and snow does not equal road. Sometimes I go 57-58 or, if I'm feeling lucky, I'll run 61-63. Regardless of the speed I am driving, you will not get me to go faster by getting on my bumper. If you want to go faster, ok, pass me, don't just hump my bumper. Are you not aware that you can pass in this particular area? Can you not see past my tiny car in your huge pick-up truck? Are you turning 10 miles from here and want to just wait it out because you enjoy the suspense? Whatever your issue is, I don't care. Stoppit.

Side request: to the douche that was going 40, then 55, then 40, then 50, then I got sick of it and passed you, then you thought it would be cool to almost rear end me and shine your brights multiple times in my rear window to punish me for passing you... your logic is...? Is this supposed to intimidate me and make me pull over so you can own the road? Are you unaware that a simple /duck maneuver allows me to evade your attempt at blinding me? Even if you're not aware of that fact, are you really so upset that you don't know how to drive and that I passed you because of it that you want me to be blind and crash into someone completely innocent because of you? To you I have this special request: get off the fucking road.

Request three: at least go the fucking speed limit.
This seems slightly hypocritical, considering what I said above about me sometimes purposely going slower. Two things to note: if I notice cars are coming up behind me I will speed up to what is comfortable to me, which is slightly over the speed limit, and if it's a busy time of day I will never go slower than the speed limit because I know how irritating it can be to be stuck behind a driver that just won't move like they should and you can't pass them because there's too many cars coming the other way. The only thing I ask in return is for this same courtesy. Too often, with no weather as an excuse and no stops coming up, people decide that it's cool to just chill and hold everyone else back.

Request four: turn signals - use them and use them properly.
I forget to use it once in a while myself, so my anger with this one is a little less justified... It's also more about me disliking things that are inefficient and hinder progress. What do I mean by "hinder progress" when it come to turn signals? When you fail to tell me that you're turning and I think you're going to keep going past where I am on the road you then cause me to wait for you to turn and then yell at you silently that I hate you for not telling me you were turning. This is especially irritating when traffic is heavier and I need every opportunity I can get to get moving again. In many cases, people not telling me "hey, have my spot" means I don't get a spot for a good solid minute or two. Just an FYI: it doesn't help for you to put on the turn signal as you're turning and it doesn't help if you leave it on after turning.

Request five: plz stop cutting me.
It hurts. A few times, it almost literally hurt. This is probably one of the most irritating ones, right after the first one. It also goes with every single other request I have had thus far. 9 times out of 10 the only reason you're cutting me off is so you can bob and weave through traffic to try to get ahead, but there's a lot of stop lights, so you're not really getting anywhere. Maybe you enjoy the thrill of it,
like it's some sort of video game... Well, sorry to disappoint, but it's most definitely not a video game and you're going to hurt someone one of these days.

Request six: learn to use your brights sparingly.
I'm sure everyone comes across people that use their brights longer than they should while coming towards you. To be perfectly honest, I believe a lot of people just forget and a quick flash of my lights gives them the message and they fix the issue promptly. Thank you to those folks. However, there are some that just don't understand this signal or maybe don't realize just how fucking bright their lights actually are and figure it's no big deal. Apparently in some places flashing of lights can be a warning for cops being up ahead, ok, but it's also universally understood to mean you should check your brights. How about a quick check, then assume there's a cop up ahead? I will admit my eyes are slightly more sensitive to bright lights than the average person, but no one will ever appreciate you leaving your brights on, regardless of how close you are to them. A great number of drivers also don't seem to realize that it's just as rude to use your brights when there's someone in front of you. I've always been tempted to pull over, let these people pass me, then show them what it's like... Maybe someday I will.

tl;dr? Drivers suck.

Re-Introduction

Hello internet.

So, I decided to give this blog thing another try. People seem to like reading and I like to write, so it's gotta be meant to be, right?

For the non-observant/non-stalker types who didn't check my profile out yet, I have been a Blogger member since July 2006. I used to blog about shit that happened to me, but I'm quite disappointed in myself for writing in the way that I did. Thus, all of those posts have been smushed. (And apparently "smushed" is not a word? What? I respectfully disagree.)

Now, rather than write in the pathetic manner in which I did before, I am going to do my best to construct intelligent yet cynical anger/sadness posts with a side of dry-as-desert humor. You may see a happy post in there somewhere, but it will mostly be anger. There are a few things you should know about me before you continue to read:

1. I'm very anti-social, yet I try to be social. I use the term "socially retarded" to try to explain to other people that I don't really understand what is going on and explain that even if I do want to talk to you I don't really know how to make words happen (except on the internet where I can take my time). I miss social hints and, when I do pick up on one, I tend to over analyze it and get the opposite from it that was intended.
2. I'm a very analytical thinker. As I stated above, I tend to over analyze things. I'm also very self-aware because of this. Over-thinking can often lead to rambling on and on in discussions or will create wall-of-text posts. I will try to include a tl;dr for those of you who are extremely lazy and just need a quick fix.
3. Very rarely my mind will just say "fuck this shit" and my heart will take over the thinking. This is normally very, very bad, especially since the brain doesn't ever fully relinquish control and will analyze the feelings my heart is doing to the point that it can't do feels anymore. This is often the cause of some crazy in my head.
4. I'm very blunt when I need to be and very blunt when I really should just fuck off and leave people alone. I do, however, try to be aware of the feelings of people and know when it's perfectly fine to be blunt and when I should be completely fake about my feelings towards the current situation.
5. You may from time to time see me reference myself as "we". For a long, long time I have thought of parts of my personality as different people in order to help cope with how extreme some of my emotions can get, especially under pressure. Some of these "personalities" have names and different faces, but I will do my best to avoid referencing myself as one of them to prevent confusion.
6. I definitely love cats. I dislike humans almost as much as I love cats. I understand cats much better than I understand people and can take even the most "lost" cats and bring them back to awesomeness. All kinds of house cats are win, but my best kitty ever was named Blaze and is dead. She was black with a small white blaze on her chest, hence the name. My favorite big cat is a black panther, preferring the leopard version slightly over the jaguar. Rawr.
7. My favorite number is 8. I'm unsure why.
8. Hi 8. I like you, but I dunno why. :3
9. Oh, I also like tacos and steak and spaghetti. And monochrome colored things.

You may be curious the origin of the blog's direction... Well, I tend to think. A lot. Definitely too much, but that's better than too little in most cases. Most thinking is done while trying to sleep or while driving. The term "moron brigade" just sort of came to me one morning while driving and silently yelling at the horrible drivers and calling them all morons. Somehow the word "brigade" was used to describe the many people which seem to come out at the most interesting of times and there it was. Then I thought about the internet and how sometimes people like to read about this stuff because they can relate to it and be frustrated with me because misery loves company. However, the blog may go a bit farther than just my irl issues at times and address other issues. I may even address issues that are none of my business or out of my realm of expertise, but only if I feel that I have observed it enough times to provide an educated opinion. I hope that most everything I write about is easy to relate to by other human beings and we can share the frustration and pain of being stuck in a world occupied mostly by morons.

Note: nothing in my blog is intended to offend people, except the morons, though I'm sure someone will find offense in something (because that's what people do). I enjoy intelligent debate with people from an opposite viewpoint, but I do not enjoy ragers and trolls. I've been a moderator on a couple different sites and have been exposed to a lot of crap because of you people and I definitely refuse to tolerate it here. I also prefer if people do not fight in the comments, but should this occur, please attempt to keep it civil. If it gets too out of hand I might go on a deleting spree and, if it continues to spiral out of control, restrict commenting.

Hopefully this clears up any confusion as to why I may be the way I am and gives you plenty of warning of what is to come. If you don't like it, you can simply move on to a different blog. There's lots out there. Ain't gonna please everyone~

tl;dr? Just read this shit. It won't kill you, I promise.